The Power and Influence of Dads

[HJCane]

A good day to recognize the powerful role Fathers play in the lives of children. The role of Mom has widely been known and historically the parent most discussed. I find it sort of strange that it's really only in recent times ( last 4-5 decades) that the very important role of Dads has even been studied and discussed. Traditionally Mom would be home with the kids with Dad out working all day as the "provider." But times have changed as we all know with many homes having both a working mom and dad.

Studies show a Father in the life of a child is so important emotionally, learning discipline, in education and IQ, and in personal relationships as the child grows into an adult. My own Dad grew up in a home where you did not talk at the dinner table, no one said I love you, and discipline was harsh. He passed at 39 when I was 16. I received plenty of the same harsh discipline from him because that's all he knew. I was tough on my 3 sons as well. Demanding they focus on school, giving their best at anything they did but not not treating them harsh if they didn't get the "A" so long as they gave an honest effort. We did and still do say I love you frequently.

I made lots of mistakes. No book on how to do this stuff in the real world. Did lots of good too. My sons are the best of friends, well rounded, well educated, hard working, GENTLEMEN most of the time.

No gift they could buy me today is better than what I just wrote....................

 

[NO.SHORECANE]

My father was not a warm and fuzzy dude. He grew up in the Depression. He taught me nobody was going to give me anything. I would have to work for it, and he was right , of course. I tried to impart the same message to my kids in a gentler but firm manner.

 

[HJCane]

My father was not a warm and fuzzy dude. He grew up in the Depression. He taught me nobody was going to give me anything. I would have to work for it, and he was right , of course. I tried to impart the same message to my kids in a gentler but firm manner.

I tried SO VERY hard NOT to make what I perceived to be errors my Dad made. Sometimes I was successful and sometimes not so much. It's the overall body of work that counts. I even apologized to my 3 sons for errors I may have made along the way. I wanted them to know that I KNEW i didn't always make the right choices as it pertained to them.

 

[NO.SHORECANE]

I tried SO VERY hard NOT to make what I perceived to be errors my Dad made. Sometimes I was successful and sometimes not so much. It's the overall body of work that counts. I even apologized to my 3 sons for errors I may have made along the way. I wanted them to know that I KNEW i didn't always make the right choices as it pertained to them.

Well said.

 

[BreakingCane]

A good day to recognize the powerful role Fathers play in the lives of children. The role of Mom has widely been known and historically the parent most discussed. I find it sort of strange that it's really only in recent times ( last 4-5 decades) that the very important role of Dads has even been studied and discussed. Traditionally Mom would be home with the kids with Dad out working all day as the "provider." But times have changed as we all know with many homes having both a working mom and dad.

Studies show a Father in the life of a child is so important emotionally, learning discipline, in education and IQ, and in personal relationships as the child grows into an adult. My own Dad grew up in a home where you did not talk at the dinner table, no one said I love you, and discipline was harsh. He passed at 39 when I was 16. I received plenty of the same harsh discipline from him because that's all he knew. I was tough on my 3 sons as well. Demanding they focus on school, giving their best at anything they did but not not treating them harsh if they didn't get the "A" so long as they gave an honest effort. We did and still do say I love you frequently.

I made lots of mistakes. No book on how to do this stuff in the real world. Did lots of good too. My sons are the best of friends, well rounded, well educated, hard working, GENTLEMEN most of the time.

No gift they could buy me today is better than what I just wrote....................

Good post. Just remember that BLM is against the nuclear family. Dads be damned, even though statistically kids who grow up in single parent homes are significantly more likely to commit a violent crime than those with two parents.

 

[NO.SHORECANE]

It's tragic how many kids there are out there growing up without a father.

 

[ZEKEMUG]

Both my parents lived thru the depression. Dad born 1910 Mom 1912. Both intelligent with great marks in school but neither had the opportunity for a HS Education. Both went to what they called Commercial after grade school. Two years then out in work force. Dad worked his way from the loading dock to Philadelphia Terminal manager. Five kids housewife mom, money was unbelievably tight. When I was very young we went to airport and Dad flew off. Only years later did I learn he was offered manager of East Coast but we would have to move to Boston. He turned it down because didn’t want to uproot his kids and simply said, I liked what I had. From there on his career went backwards and by retirement he was manager of loading dock again. We were poor money wise but I’ve always respected him for his decision. He taught me contentment is the true measure of success.

 

[NO.SHORECANE]

^^ Nice post

 

[HJCane]

We see here that every person has a history, a story, real world examples of over coming obstacles and struggles. In America I would say this is much more the norm than the exception. Not complaining so don't read it that way.

In my home one thing I did and I tell this to young parents, is the family dinner. It was NON NEGOTIABLE! When they are young it's easy but as they become teens it becomes harder. However, in my house, when my sons were in high school, they would say Dad i'm going out with my friends at 7:30 tonight on a friday night and I would say no you're not FAMILY DINNER. BUT you can meet your friends at 8:30. They knew not to even debate the issue.

Of all the important things Dads do those family dinners are SO IMPORTANT and allows for time just to sit, eat, and talk. Of course 3 sons they would bicker and argue about which WR or RB was the better player and do what boys do BUT it didn't matter. It was that 1 hour or so together that makes the difference.

 

[NO.SHORECANE]

In our house, phones have never been invited to dinner.

 

[HJCane]

In our house, phones have never been invited to dinner.

When mine were in high school and part of College these newer phones weren't really around quite yet. Now, can't get them off the damn thing especially my 28 year old.

 

[mahb]

A Bunch of Real Good Solid Fathers on here From outstanding Families. Proud you're CANES, Hermanos ! Cheers to you all !!!!